Friday, February 13, 2004

You Shot Me in the Heart

Not being a fan of NBC's ER, I have no way of telling how many verbal gems can be found throughout the collective life of the show. But last Thursday, I was entertained by a fantastic emergency room scenerio.

Basically the store goes…

A man and woman enter the emergency room. The man has been shot in the leg, accidentially by the woman, whom is his wife. They are verbally sparing, to cover the fright. The doctors examine the man, looking for the bullet that went into his leg, but hasn’t come out and is not viewable in the lower extremites.

Husband and wife are still sparing.  “I told you we shouldn’t have a gun in the house,” states the fretting wife. “It was fine until you shot me,” or something akin, spews from the wounded husband. The doctors interrupt, we found the bullet. Apparently, the bullet was adventurous. Not only was it unwilling to stay couped up and the close confines of a gun chamber, it was equally unwilling to sit still while set free to roam the fast hinderland that was the husbands internal landscape. It meander, lollygagged, and then headed due north, up an artery, and found itself lodged into a section of the man’s heart before it got stuck.

Whether or not this is physically accomplishable by a bullet, I can’t say. But what I can say, is I found it funny as hell, as the doctor tells man and wife, “the bullet’s lodged in a section of the heart, and is causing some irritation.” The husband gets all wide-eyed, and exclaims, accustorily of course, to the wife, “You shot me in the heart!” The wife, both appalled by the news, but determined not to be placed at blame, responds, “I shot you in the leg. Besides, I didn’t want a gun in the house anyway.”

Classic.

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